WRITING A EULOGY
Impact On Others
The coworker they mentored who credits them for their career
The neighbor whose lawn they mowed for years without being asked
The cashier at the grocery store who looked forward to their visits
The server at their regular restaurant who knew their order
The young person they encouraged who never forgot it
The friend who called them first with every piece of news
The student they taught who still thinks of them
The person they helped who never got to say thank you The mail carrier who chatted with them every day for years
The stranger they helped once who never forgot the kindness
Small Acts of Service
How they always drove so others could enjoy a drink at parties
The way they shoveled everyone’s sidewalk, not just their own How they stayed late to help clean up every event
Their willingness to watch pets, kids, or houses without hesitation
The thank-you notes they wrote faithfully How they visited people in the hospital when no one else did
The way they included the person sitting alone
How they brought food when someone was struggling, no request needed
Their habit of picking up litter in the park during walks
The way they always had jumper cables and knew how to use them
What Made Them Laugh
Joy is as important to remember as accomplishment:
What made them laugh so hard they cried
Their sense of humor that not everyone understood
The comedian or show they quoted constantly
What they found funny that they probably should not have
How their laugh sounded, and how it was contagious
Prompts
What did they do every single day?
What would they say right now if they could hear us?
What did you complain about that you would give anything to experience again?
What is a story that makes you smile when you think of them?
What did they teach you without meaning to?
If I had met them at a party, what would they have talked about?
What did they care about that surprised people?
What would be playing at their house right now?
What did they smell like, cologne, sawdust, coffee, garden soil?
What is something they did that nobody else does quite the same way?
Who will miss them that we might not think about?
What ordinary thing did they make special?
How They Made You Feel
How you knew they were listening, their specific way of paying attention
What it felt like to disappoint them
How they made you feel capable of more than you thought
The way they remembered details about your life
How they made strangers feel welcome immediately
What it was like to receive their full attention
How they celebrated other people’s good news
The way they noticed when something was wrong without you saying it
How they made kids feel important and heard
What it felt like to be forgiven by them
How they made you feel safe
The way they showed up when they said they would
How they made ordinary moments feel special
What it was like to laugh with them THow they made you feel less alone
Talents & Skills
How they could fix anything mechanical just by looking at it
Their ability to grow anything, even plants others could not keep alive
How they remembered everyone’s birthday without writing them down
Their talent for making people laugh at exactly the right moment
How they cooked without recipes and it always turned out right
Their ability to parallel park in impossible spaces
How they knew when someone was lying
Their storytelling that made even boring events entertaining
Their skill at packing a car so everything fit perfectly
How they knew exactly what to say in hard moments
Their knack for negotiating or talking their way into anything
How they made friends with anyone within five minutes
Their talent for seeing solutions others missed
How they remembered details from conversations years ago
Daily Rituals
How they took their coffee, and the specific mug they always used
Their morning routine that never varied
What they did every Sunday without fail
The chair that was “theirs,” and how everyone knew not to sit in it
What time they went to bed every night, no matter what
Their newspaper-reading ritual, which sections and in what order
How they said goodbye, a specific phrase, gesture, or tradition
What they wore around the house when no one was coming over
Their grocery shopping routine, same day, same store, same route through the aisles
How they watched TV, commentary, remote habits, favorite spot
Their evening walk route that never changed
What they always had for breakfast
How they answered the phone, their specific greeting
Their bedtime routine that felt sacred
What they did first thing when they got home from work
Things They Always Said
Their response to “How are you?” that was distinctly theirs
What they said when someone was upset
Their go-to advice that they repeated to everyone
How they ended phone conversations
What they said when they were frustrated, their clean curse words
Their catchphrase that everyone could imitate
What they said when someone did something kind
2Their specific way of giving a compliment
What they said when someone was overthinking
Their response to bad news that somehow made it more bearable
How they expressed love if they did not say “I love you” directly
What they said when they were proud but tried not to show it
Their way of deflecting compliments
What they said when they were right and knew it
Their greeting for people they loved
Highly Specific Features
Their specific, sometimes irrational, pet peeves
The way they organized things that made sense only to them
Their weird food combinations or preferences
What they refused to throw away, no matter how broken
Their stubborn insistence on doing things the hard way
How they mispronounced a word and refused to correct it
Their superstitions or rituals that had to be followed
The thing they collected that no one understood
Their opinion on something trivial that they defended passionately
How they wore their clothes, untucked shirts, rolled sleeves, an inside-out lucky tee
Their relationship with technology, and how they talked to it
The food they refused to eat, and why
Their driving habits that made everyone nervous
How they “fixed” things with duct tape and determination
The one song they knew all the words to, and sang badly